


Votes (A 5 Times Story)

by Darklady



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Crack, Elections
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-06
Updated: 2012-11-06
Packaged: 2017-11-18 02:31:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/555900
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Darklady/pseuds/Darklady
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Voting habits of highly fan-fic'ed characters.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Votes (A 5 Times Story)

**Author's Note:**

> Partial repost from years long past - but the nice thing about politics is how much of it gets recycled. :-)

Elizabeth Weir takes great pride in the effort she puts out to make sure every Atlantian – regardless of country of citizenship – get the chance to vote in their respective national and regional elections. Democracy is important. Democracy is good. Every person has the inherent right to control their own destiny, to have their voice heard, to have their opinions be fully counted when it comes to the important matters that affect their lives.

Of course it can’t work that way here. 

In Atlantis she has to be in charge.

Obviously. 

But she still deeply believes in democracy.

~!@!~

Lacking the time for non-Nobel-related research, Rodney has developed a simple voting strategy.

After every election he looks over the new crop of political hacks and he picks out the worst moronic, malingering, malfeasant, pocket-lining son-of-a-bitch in the bunch. Then, for the rest of their term, whatever the chosen mine-canary campaigns for? Rodney votes against.

Rodney realizes that – procedurally speaking – his formula has flaws.

On the other hand? Pairing predictive accuracy with statistically significant results?

It hasn’t let him down yet.

~!@!~

John always votes.

Well, he always files a ballot. 

Sometimes he picks a few decent-sounding guys. Sometimes it’s blank. On one memorable occasion he wrote in Mickey Mouse.

Whatever happens on the inside, John knows his duty. He always registers and he always gets in line.

On Atlantis John makes sure he’s the first in line. Even if that means getting to the gate room on half an hours sleep. Here he’s not just an officer, he’s *the* officer, and he owes it to his command to set a good example.

That said?

Inside?

The paper’s still blank.

~!@!~

Radek Zelenka not only votes, he uses up his personal bandwidth sending long letters full of questions to the candidates. All of them. In all the parties. When he runs out of computer time he barters for more. He subscribes to fourteen political magazines in seven languages. He keeps files of newspaper articles cross-indexed by name and issue. He knows the voting record of every politician currently in power and the platform of every one who is not.

Zelenka approaches the ballot very seriously.

This is because Radek Zelenka has a very *very* good memory.

He remembers the time when he didn’t have the chance to vote. And he remembers that he is the only person in the first Atlantis Expedition who does not consider the *Wraith* to be the most evil, soul-destroying creatures to exist in the universe.

~!@!~

The Athosians do not hold elections.

Weir tried to explain the process – back when her people first allied with Athos.

Teyla had smiled, and wondered why the Tauri waited so long for their leaders to listen to them.


End file.
